Changes. That's the name of the game these days. Yesterday & today I had interviews to work at Nazareth with Sam. The first one was a breeze and the second one today was with both Sam and I together. It ended up being more conversation than interview. Things seem to be going smoothly toward getting the job with the exception that I don't have my license. Which is a requirement.


SOOOOOOO. I'm practicing driving. It's nerve racking. And today I drove with my babies in the car. The first time was a success. (not wonderful but I wasn't in tears afterwards either.) But this afternoon we went to get a prescription from CVS. And our lovely windshield wiper switch is on the same side as the blinkers. Take a moment....I'm attempting to turn...and click on the correct blinker...left or right whichever way I needed to go when I miraculously turn of the flipping wind shield wipers. Attempt to pull over out of the way(so I can turn of the dang wipers) but in the process I am not in position to go through the CVS drive thru ....so I need to back up. My current driving nemesis. BIG mistake to do while already flustered. Nothing terrible happened. I did hit the curb. Scary as crap. But the rest of the way home I just was on emotion overload & not driving my best. The end. It wasn't fun. But in the end still somewhat a success....b/c no one got hurt. Or dead.

I drove some yesterday. Follow by tears to get out all the stress of it. Conquering your fears is harder than it sounds!

Sometimes my ignorance overwhelms me. Today is one of those days. I did drive some today so I give myself a pat on the back. Go me.

Ready for big brother!!!!

Hello All! We're back from VACA & I'm swimming up to my ears in messes. We finally have the money to start back up on the bathroom which I can't remember if I've mentioned here or not. Well we're getting a bathroom in our basement apartment!!! The
"dungeon" will eventually be a home.

Vacation was a blast. This year be rented beachfront property. And I hope we will always be able to do it. It's more expensive but SO worth it. Whenever Mal needed a nap I just walked back to the house instead of waiting for everyone to pack up to go. It was quite when we needed it to be. And convenient.

Next week we'll be celebrating Zeke's 4th birthday! And Sam's birthday too! (not his 4th hehe) And Staci will be leaving me. :-( Fortunately we will be having a road trip together so I have something to look forward too.

Considering doing correspondence college. And getting my goals together. As usual getting a license is at the top of the list. Then I will be able to work with Sam or some other job. And lots of other things on my "to do" list of life. Also as usual it's all just dreaming until I "just do it" and DRIVE!

Sam is gone for a eight day shift so I am mentally preparing to be mommy/daddy for a week. We will have a couple of breaks in the week. Gonna go to a 31 party & the boys will stay with Sam for a few hours. And we will all go to see the fireworks for the 4th and see the parade. It's always great to do family activities and break up the monotony when Sam's on a long shift.

Running out of time here. The indians are getting restless. Toys are flying. Gotta go....hope to post a few pictures soon.

Yuck! Nasty headache & yucka sinus problems. I hate allergy colds!

FYI:

Letting your kids feed themselves has both advantages and disadvantages. Yes, I'm sure your know this...but in case you forgot here is a mental picture. Imagine me checking your blogs and attempting comments. When out of no where there comes a splat on my neck. Hmmmm, what could that be? Yep-just been given an oatmeal bath from my lovely (and lucky for him- cutie pie) 15 month old. Thanks Mal I needed that! Right- like I need a hole in my head. So long blogger, got things to do. Like clean up one mess after another!

You know you're fat when:

A lifelong friend you haven't seen in a while doesn't recognize you. True story. I almost cried.

Buzz buzz...

LOW BATTERY! Crud. Can't find my charger AGAIN.

My Life today~

Mal has a summer cold and so last night we spent two hours of saline drops, snot sucker and the lovely breathing machine. All in the middle of the night & in the middle of a six day NO daddy shift. After several cups of coffee this AM I woke up and welcomed the day.

During the boys quiet time I made a new list of movies to see. It's for my netflix queue. We have the plan for two out at a time. But what I love best is the instant viewing feature. There's lots choose from. And we don't have to wait for them to come. Most of it is older stuff but I usually can find something to watch when we have the time.

The boys played in mud today. It has rained here everyday for four or five days in a row. Justus LOVED it, Zeke not so much. I will be glad when we have a bathroom of our own so the boys can go straight there instead of washing off to go upstairs to get a bath.

I got an idea for a kids book today. It may never become anything more than a thought but you never know. Silly as it is the thought of the idea of a book made me smile.

The day is winding down and we're watching G-force...on netflix. :-)

Mother's Day~

For Mother's Day I slept late (9:30ish!) And then got up and did nothing. Sam and my Dad grilled and made lunch. YUMMY grilled chicken, scalloped potatoes, salad. And the boys favorite- Doritos. For dessert our neighbors had brought over Krispy Kreme doughnuts! And my dad bought a cheesecake! And my sister brought a cookie cake. Too many choices.

Then after lunch we rolled out to go and watch Carson's (high school) production of "Footloose". Mom and I are both musical lovers and had a great time watching the kids sing and dance. The "acting" not so much. But overall a very enjoyable way to spend the afternoon.

Sam bought me a Hershey's syrup hand poured candle. And a cute coffee mug. Chocolate colored...it says: Coffee makes it possible to get out of bed. CHOCOLATE makes it worthwhile. Cute huh? That is if you like coffee.

Interesting side note: I didn't drink coffee until having my 3rd child. Still like iced coffee best but usually have a cup or two hot in the AM. Especially if Sam is at work.

The new do~ before & after

On my mind~

While watching a episode of "Law and Order", I saw a lady putting on a bra with just one hook. Call me stupid but I was almost jealous. While most people pay to get bigger boobs I'd be happy to have mine smaller.

Shopping today I saw two ladies with cancer. For a split second I started to panic a bit. My grandmother has had breast cancer twice now. So many women deal with this horrible cancer and it seems that there are new kinds of cancer showing up almost daily. I HATE cancer.

It's our tenth year anniversary this year -in September. I'd love to come up with some great surprise.


I finally had Sam cut Malachi's hair. I really miss my curly headed kiddo. His hair is so blond he looks bald. We'll be using lots of sunscreen on that noggin!

In a little more than a month we will be on vacation! Justus will be out of school. Zeke will turn 4. And I will still be wishing I had my license. I don't know why but my mind cannot get over the terror at the thought of driving. It's so dumb but I just haven't been able to get past it.

Moving on....we're getting a bathroom!!!!! OK. In all honesty I'm not holding my breath at the moment BUT we've started moving things around in our basement "apartment" and are making plans on where things will go. And the anticipation may just kill me. Or not.

Last but not least, sir Zeke has decided to attempt potty training. It's totally different from how it happened with Justus. One week and we were done. With Z it's gonna be on his terms and at his pace. Nevertheless...I am thankful!

ps Why is thankful spelt with only one L & not two like all the other llll words. For example fell, full, well, etc. I'm assuming that English 101 would be good for me right about now.

Scary stuff!

US low score on world motherhood rankings: charity

The United States has scored poorly on a campaign group's list of the best countries in which to be a mother, managing only 28th place, and bettered by many smaller and poorer countries.

"A woman in the Unites States is more than five times as likely as a woman in Bosnia and Herzegovina, Greece or Italy to die from pregnancy-related causes in her lifetime and her risk of maternal death is nearly 10-fold that of a woman in Ireland," the report said.

"At this rate, a child in the US is more than twice as likely as a child in Finland, Iceland, Sweden or Singapore to die before his or her fifth birthday," the report noted.

And it added: "The United States has the least generous maternity leave policy -- both in terms of duration and percent of wages paid -- of any wealthy nation."

Um it really stinks that a xxl doesn't fit anymore. Being a 3x is SO discouraging. Had to get out a little complaint. Think it would help to sew my mouth shut???

Angel~

Today we visited with Angel at the hospital in Charlotte. Justus was right at home & he and Zeke sat right down and played with Angel for a little while. Myra told me about everything that's been going on since they found the tumor.

As far as they can tell the doctors were able to get most of the tumor. They think that it is/was a slow growing tumor but there may more surgeries and/or needed to get everything. Because of the surgery a lot of Angel's senses were affected. Specifically the coordination & balance part.

She has three different kinds of therapy: recreational, occupational and physical. They keep her pretty busy. Right now she is using a wheel chair to get around most of the time but she is very determined to get out of it soon. While we were there she unbuckled herself twice and started trying to walk on her own. Also affected is her eyesight.


The docs say it will be at least another 2 weeks before she is ready to go home. And be able to stay alone without health care supervision. But they are seeing progress every day & it's really amazing! Please keep Angel in your prayers!

Urgent Prayer Request~

Please pray for Angel. She is a little girl in Justus' kindergarten class. They found a tumor in her brain and she is scheduled for surgery this week. Angel is a sweet girl who has already overcome many obstacles. And I can't imagine what her parents are going through. I don't know her dad's name but her momma's name is Myra. She and I work together to do the class parties. She is a great mom and I'm sure her heart is breaking right now.

Mal gave me the sweetest hug just a few minutes ago when he woke up from his nap. I LOVE it! He's can be quite grumpy so I especially enjoy the love when he's in the mood! He's starting to "talk" a little. He says his version of "Hey" and "Hey there". Too cute.

Something new~

We visited a church on Saturday night. I loved the fact that it was at night. The service was short, sweet and to the point. Loved that too. I hope we will go back again. Since we left our previous church we've only done home church. That has many benefits but I still miss the fact of getting out of the house and into some fellowship in a place specifically dedicated to God. Does that make any sense at all? Our homes should be dedicated to God as well. But many times (for me) it becomes my hide out for complacency. "Going" to church is also a form of accountability for me. At home it's easy to plan on doing it later and then never getting around to it.

I also practiced driving a little yesterday. A big step for me since I'm terrified to do it. When I got home I was shaking like a leaf. But not headed towards a panic attack as usual so it's a small step forward.

Me

Sometimes I feel so lost. This season of my life is so discouraging. So confusing. To call it a valley would be an understatement. And yet there is so much to be thankful for. My thoughts go back and forth between so many emotions I feel like I could loose my mind at any moment. Let me say I am so grateful for HOPE and a little thing called FAITH. When I get really quiet there is a still small voice reminding me of whom I belong to. Of who I really am. And that is enough to hold onto.